How to overcome discouragement in the healing process

Whenever you take on a new journey, there are moments of when you will experience discouragement in the process. There’s overwhelm. There’s fear. There’s disappointment. There’s confusion. There’s moments when you will feel hopeless, and this is when you are ready give up. You become hard on yourself and start to sabotage your progress when you experience these moment of discouragement.

Discouragement is part of the journey

First, when you are feeling discouraged, I want to acknowledge that it’s okay to feel that way. It’s just not okay to stay there. In the past you may have tried to avoid it. Or when you encountered it, you made that as a reason to stop what you’re doing and go back to where you started. But just know that discouragement and those feelings that go along with it, is part of the journey. You can’t avoid it. So in order to heal, you must learn to move through it.

I get it. I’ve been there. And when you’re in this state, you lose confidence and you begin to focus more on your failures and what should have or could have been. Just know that the biggest part of whether you succeed or fail is how you handle these very strong emotions, because we all experience discouragement when our expectations aren’t met.

It’s frustrating when the weight you wanted to lose isn’t lost. You didn’t get that promotion you wanted. You couldn’t get the business started. The marriage or the relationship just didn’t work out. It’s a part of life. It’s going to happen. It’s what you do with those disappointments that matter.

What typically happens is you eventually become your own worst enemy after facing disappointment after disappointment. All these thoughts get all in your head. You start to believe that you’re not good enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, or that you’re too old. If that isn’t enough, you begin to make excuses such as, “I don’t have the time” or “the money” or “the experience”.

Become aware of your thoughts

In order to heal and move from this period of discouragement, you have to learn to become aware of your thoughts and start to take responsibility of those actions, based on those thoughts. You must acknowledge those voices in your head and what they are telling you, because your beliefs direct your choices, behaviors, and actions.

It’s the negative beliefs that prevent you from achieving more freedom in your life. The examples I mentioned earlier, not being good enough, not smart enough, or being too old… These are self-limiting beliefs and they love to make their way into your mind when you decide to make positive changes in your life.

These negative beliefs are old programs that control your mind. They could have been planted in you at childhood, after a traumatic event, or after you kept making the same mistakes over and over again.  Once you realize this pattern, just know that you can change these old programs. But in order to do that, you have to first become aware of what you’re thinking about, and you’ll be surprised at what you tell yourself daily.

You got to begin to monitor your thoughts daily, and replace those thoughts with more positive, supportive thoughts. Because what you feed your mind is as important, if not more important, than what you feed your bodies. You have to learn to feed yourself words of encouragement, faith, love, and grace.

It’s natural to have the desire to return to your old habits, because they are more comfortable. That’s human nature and something all of us fight with. But the good news, is you can train your mind to think differently, and when you think differently, you will start to act differently.

Don’t confuse your struggles with failure

I don’t want you to confuse your struggles with failure. Sometimes the beginning of success does look like a hot mess. But success comes from putting all your mess together and becoming who you want to be. Learn to look at your struggles as a test, an exercise, a chance to develop those physical, mental, and spiritual muscles.

Instead of giving up every time things get rough, this is the time to reflect on why it’s occurring and learn how you can get through it the best way you can.

For me, many of my disappointments have come from giving up too soon. But most of my successful moments came after I had gone through the challenge or the struggle. Sometimes what I saw on the other side of the struggle, was better than what I could have ever imagined! I found this state to be where I learned the most about myself and what I am capable of. And now, I even welcome challenges. I take them on, knowing that something rewarding is going to be on the other side. After I come out of these low points, I realized I have become more resilient and confident.

Trials are going to come when least expected, but you need to be ready for them, and love yourself throughout the process.

Discouragement is the biggest thing that keeps many of us from achieving our goals and giving up too soon.

One of the biggest mistakes many of us make, is failing to reach out or being willing to admit that we’re struggling, because we’re ashamed. But admitting your setbacks is a very powerful move and is one of the first steps to healing.

You don’t have to go through this alone. There’s so many resources, groups and organizations out there that can help you get closer to success and experience personal growth in the process.

This is why I encourage you to not be afraid to reach out to like-minded individuals who can support you. People you can talk to and bounce around ideas with.

Another thing about discouragement, it’s what you experience, because you are so anxious to succeed in this endeavor, and it means a lot to you. You are so tired of being tired. I get it, but you got to use this feeling to move you forward and not hold you back.

Reflect for a moment to realize just how far you’ve come and appreciate what it took to get you here. You had a certain amount of strength to get where you are today. When those feelings of discouragement start to sneak back in your mind, stay strong and stay on that course of action that will take you closer to your goals.

Don’t give up.

Be patient with the process. You will get stronger as you go, I promise.

Don’t believe your mistakes are a sign of failure.

Take these mistakes as an opportunity to reevaluate, reassess, and move forward.

And remember this:

Discouragement, is not permanent, and don’t make it a reason to give up. Your breakthrough may be right around the corner.

Let’s talk about how I can help you overcome discouragement and get to your ideal health destination.

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And until next time, go out there and achieve more freedom in your health and your life!

Dr. Leona